The explanation that we pre-empt the ridicule by inflicting it on ourselves first is really insightful. I can identify with being ridiculed on a regular basis as a kid.
To go off on a tangent, this reminded me of how assholes (pardon my language) respond to self-deprecating humor. Instead of laughing _with_ the self-deprecating person or saying, "that's not true, you're not an idiot" (as you encourage), assholes pile on and further ridicule the person. This behavior strikes me as the stark opposite of what you're advocating for here.
Yeah definitely the opposite of what I'm suggesting here. Though I suppose that's another good reason to stop using self-deprecating language... prevents that potential pile on from even starting. I've noticed something similar when talking about my sobriety. If I lead with how proud I am for stopping drinking, it really tends to silence any addict shaming followups.
Good observations Patrick. Appreciation, respect and tolerance are what get me down the road with myself and others these days. Some days go better than others.
Love this simple but important tool you’re sharing. I also really enjoy the clarity in your language! Saved the podcast episode to listen to later. Thank you!
The explanation that we pre-empt the ridicule by inflicting it on ourselves first is really insightful. I can identify with being ridiculed on a regular basis as a kid.
To go off on a tangent, this reminded me of how assholes (pardon my language) respond to self-deprecating humor. Instead of laughing _with_ the self-deprecating person or saying, "that's not true, you're not an idiot" (as you encourage), assholes pile on and further ridicule the person. This behavior strikes me as the stark opposite of what you're advocating for here.
Yeah definitely the opposite of what I'm suggesting here. Though I suppose that's another good reason to stop using self-deprecating language... prevents that potential pile on from even starting. I've noticed something similar when talking about my sobriety. If I lead with how proud I am for stopping drinking, it really tends to silence any addict shaming followups.
Great anecdote about how to cut down on addict shaming.
Good observations Patrick. Appreciation, respect and tolerance are what get me down the road with myself and others these days. Some days go better than others.
Love this simple but important tool you’re sharing. I also really enjoy the clarity in your language! Saved the podcast episode to listen to later. Thank you!